The Friday Rant: Tennis players, shut up!

WHY WHY WHY do tennis players make so many stupid noises when they play anymore? Especially the women. Horrible grunts, annoying high-pitched shrieks. I can’t stand to keep the sound up any more. I can understand an “oof” sound when you hit the ball, but a high, drawn-out “eeeee!” is ridiculous.

And don’t say it’s sexist. No, the women are just more annoying. Let’s don’t be so politically correct. I can handle low-pitched annoying noises better than ear-drilling screams. But the main problem is, why do they draw it out so long?

Maria Sharapova is famous for her noise, but a new player, Portugal’s Michelle Larcher de Brito, puts her to shame. Seriously, I played a bit of video from one of her games, and my daughter’s dog became so upset, she ran over and sniffed the laptop anxiously. Listen here:

Apparently it’s gotten bad enough that the International Tennis Federation is considering penalizing players who are just too damn loud. I guess there’s some strategy here — players trying to distract and annoy their opponents enough to throw them off their game — but Lord, what about us poor fans? It’s sure annoying and distracting for us!

When a tennis player is grunting louder than a football player getting sandwiched by 300-pound opponents, there’s a problem. I think they just need to SHUT UP.


About alisaacarter

I am a writer of young adult novels, wife, mom of three, lover of animals, former magazine editor, reader of anything paranormal, and coffee fanatic.
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